11 Most Common BDSM Kinks You Should Know

BDSM is the acronym for Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, and Sadism and Masochism. There are a lot of practices, outfits, and aesthetics people associate with BDSM, but many people don't know what the kinks and fantasies behind these surface details are.

Most of the common words aren't as extreme as people might think. These are the kinks that stand out for their popularity and prevalence in the BDSM community. Let's take a look.

1. Bondage

The first word in the BDSM acronym, bondage, refers to the consensual use of restraints such as ropes, chains, and handcuffs to limit a person's freedom of movement. Many BDSM sessions begin with bondage as a method for the sub to lose general control of the situation, giving their dom the power and authority to do with them what they will.

Bondage helps to make one feel vulnerable and lose control, implicitly having to put more trust in their partner. In addition, it stops involuntary reactions of preservation and retaliation, letting one slip into more dangerous territory. Ultimately, it's about feeling released from everyday responsibilities and having control of the situation willingly given over to someone else.

2. Discipline

Discipline is the activity in BDSM of setting rules and giving punishments for when those rules are disobeyed - all playfully, of course. Discipline can be done through physical, emotional, and psychological means.

The purpose of discipline is to establish and reify the power dynamic between dominant and submissive, reinforcing how is the authority in the situation.

3. Dominance and Submission (D/s)

D/s refers to the power exchange in a BDSM session when one person takes on the dominant role, and the other assumes the submissive role. Besides being a psychologically thrilling exchange, it's also practical for bondage, discipline, and sadomasochism, the other parts of the BDSM acronym. These practices are not easily fulfilled without something like the D/s role split being used.

Broadly speaking, it works by first having both parties consent to the session. Then, the dominant controls the session's activities, while the submissive agrees to submit to their choices and control.

The dynamic can also extend beyond just the physical act - becoming an emotional and psychological differential or even expanding into a full-on relationship dynamic.

4. Sadism and Masochism

Sadism refers to deriving pleasure from giving pain, while masochism is gaining pleasure from receiving it. While both can seem counterintuitive, the power dynamics at play with consent always formed in the background can lead to a heightened form of erotic experience.

Activities include everything from spanking, whipping, pinching, and more. The experience of reaching the euphoric state through this means has been called 'subspace' or 'topspace.' This is one of the most crucial areas to engage in proper consent and safeword use, escalating the experience slowly and within everyone's bounds.

5. Sensory Deprivation

Sensory deprivation refers to removing one or more of the senses to heighten the impact of others and to make the experience more unexpected. The most common of these are blindfolds for the eyes and headphones or earplugs for the ears.

More generally, sensory deprivation leads to a greater sense of anticipation and vulnerability, which can heighten the submissive's overall experience.

6. Role-Playing

Role-playing is the acting out of scenarios and fantasies during a session. Common roles almost always include a power differential, like master/slave, teacher/student, and doctor/patient. But countless other variations are also possible.

Roleplay can heighten immersion and help both parties take on different personas and explore new sides of their personalities. It's one of the most creative areas of BDSM, and the possibilities are endless.

7. Objectification

Objectification is a more deliberate form of regular objectification that people discuss daily. It's about turning your partners into a mere object of pleasure for your gratification and the removal of their sense of individuality and personhood. This might mean treating them poorly or even like a piece of furniture.

As another form of power exchange, it is almost the ultimate form of power differential, with the dominant being worshiped and the submissive dehumanized. While, of course, it sounds bad, the psychological thrill of it can be high for some practitioners. Just be sure it's what both of you want in the session.

8. Chastity and Orgasm Control

Another exciting form of play is controlling your partner's sexual release. A simple method for this is edging, which involves bringing your partner to the edge of climax and stopping before they can release. A more intense form is a chastity belt, which prevents release for the duration it's on.

This can be so gratifying because the power play with control in combination with the more intense form of release that occurs when there's delayed gratification.

9. Impact Play

As the name implies, this is all about striking the body with different implements like paddles, whips, and canes, all for the sake of sexual gratification.

Like eating spicy food or the euphoria after a hard workout, impact play works by releasing endorphins that come after being struck by pain. It can be quite high, and many people report feeling they reach a trance-like state.

Impact play can be mild to extreme, so just make sure you carefully build up to the more intense varieties and always check for consent and boundaries before going too far.

10. Foot Fetishism

An extremely common fetish, some evidence has shown that the mapping of the feet in our brain is near to the map of our genitalia, making a cross-wired situation in some people. Regardless of the cause, there are many people out there with a deep erotic fascination with feet.

In addition, the bottoms of the feet are very sensitive, which, in combination with erotic possibilities with the toes, makes the feet quite an appealing erogenous zone.

11. Pet Play

The subject of many a stereotypical image of BDSM on the big screen, pet play involves the submissive taking on the role of an animal, typically a dog or cat, and being treated as a pet by their partner.

Pet play often involves accessories like collars, leashes, and feeding bowls, with animal-like behaviors including walking on all fours. Sometimes, it involves masks abstractly shaped like the animal in question.

Generally, the submissive enjoys such play because they act carefree and let their animal brain run wild, while the dominant takes care of them and gives them activities to do.

There is a vast variety of BDSM kinks, some complex, and some extreme. But, as we can see with these most common ones, a lot are relatively harmless and can be incorporated into anyone's sexual routine.

The appeal of power dynamics, the release and taking of control, and the creativity in role-playing have been known since the beginning of human civilization. We hope these common kinks have offered a glimpse into the not-so-strange world of BDSM.